None of us are perfect, but I think each of us can agree that until we
accept the fact that we do not truly understand the point of view of the
other person, we will never find a common ground to build on. One lesson I have learned from my wife is the value of a heartfelt
apology. I used to believe that an apology was equal to admitting some
kind of defeat. For a Marine and police officer, that is sometimes a
difficult thing to do. During one of these arguments when I would refuse
to apologize, she told me something that I have really grown to
appreciate. She said, “an apology doesn’t always have to mean you did
something wrong, it can simply mean that you are just sorry something
has happened”.
As a cop I am truly sorry that people have been
hurt and killed by the very people who have taken an oath to protect
them. When one human kills another it is tragic. The purpose of this
editorial is to not place blame, justify actions, or make claims on
things I know little about. It is simply to tell all those, who mistrust
law enforcement, that from someone who carries a badge, that I am sorry
if you have every felt, intimidated, singled out, or mistreated because
of the color of your skin, socio-economic status, sexual orientation,
or a myriad of other things that make you different from me.
I am
saddened to see the wedge that this issue has created. Media (social
and traditional) is on fire with views that are more focused on dividing
us then unifying us. They give the microphone to those who are the
loudest instead of those who are the wisest. This has become a
polarizing topic causing people to take sides. It seems at this point
you either have to be pro-cop or anti-cop. If these are our only two
options, then where will we be a year from now?
When people argue
they clash. Every argument causes them to dig their heels deeper into
the argument. Without some kind of intervention this can become highly
emotional. So how do we navigate these troubled waters? I have found
that until we find some kind of common ground (something we can all
agree on) then we can’t move forward with finding a solution.
The
same can be true for the current relationship between those who support
law enforcement and those who mistrust it. Are there things we can all
agree on?
None of us are perfect, but I think each of us can agree that until
we accept the fact that we do not truly understand the point of view of
the other person, we will never find a common ground to build on. If you
hate cops then have coffee with one or go on a ride-along. If you are a
cop frustrated with all the cop bashing lately, then attend a town hall
meeting and listen to the frustration of the people within your
community. This might not be the end all solution, but it is a start.
words from Daniel Cortes, PhD
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