I am a Cop, and I am Sorry

None of us are perfect, but I think each of us can agree that until we accept the fact that we do not truly understand the point of view of the other person, we will never find a common ground to build on. One lesson I have learned from my wife is the value of a heartfelt apology. I used to believe that an apology was equal to admitting some kind of defeat. For a Marine and police officer, that is sometimes a difficult thing to do. During one of these arguments when I would refuse to apologize, she told me something that I have really grown to appreciate. She said, “an apology doesn’t always have to mean you did something wrong, it can simply mean that you are just sorry something has happened”.

As a cop I am truly sorry that people have been hurt and killed by the very people who have taken an oath to protect them. When one human kills another it is tragic. The purpose of this editorial is to not place blame, justify actions, or make claims on things I know little about. It is simply to tell all those, who mistrust law enforcement, that from someone who carries a badge, that I am sorry if you have every felt, intimidated, singled out, or mistreated because of the color of your skin, socio-economic status, sexual orientation, or a myriad of other things that make you different from me.

I am saddened to see the wedge that this issue has created. Media (social and traditional) is on fire with views that are more focused on dividing us then unifying us. They give the microphone to those who are the loudest instead of those who are the wisest. This has become a polarizing topic causing people to take sides. It seems at this point you either have to be pro-cop or anti-cop. If these are our only two options, then where will we be a year from now?

When people argue they clash. Every argument causes them to dig their heels deeper into the argument. Without some kind of intervention this can become highly emotional. So how do we navigate these troubled waters? I have found that until we find some kind of common ground (something we can all agree on) then we can’t move forward with finding a solution.
The same can be true for the current relationship between those who support law enforcement and those who mistrust it. Are there things we can all agree on?

None of us are perfect, but I think each of us can agree that until we accept the fact that we do not truly understand the point of view of the other person, we will never find a common ground to build on. If you hate cops then have coffee with one or go on a ride-along. If you are a cop frustrated with all the cop bashing lately, then attend a town hall meeting and listen to the frustration of the people within your community. This might not be the end all solution, but it is a start.
words from Daniel Cortes, PhD

Signs You're Dealing with a Groomzilla

 

 In this world we are living  wedding planning there is a new beast 

making its way onto the scene. Its origins is just from the species known as the "bridezilla" and then this creature usually boasts more body hair, and fewer pairs of shoes. And the last time i checked , It's known to wildly screech phrases such as "cigar bar" and "groom's cake," and usually possesses a multitude of unfounded, passionate opinions. That's right, and it brings us to the word  Groomzilla.

Have you encountered one of these fascinating mammals? Are you perhaps engaged to one? Here are some telltale signs that yes, that man is in fact a Groomzilla.
1. He Won't Budge
This man wants basketball-themed centerpieces and he won't compromise. He understands that they completely clash with the established color scheme, but he doesn't care because it's the NBA finals.
2. He Offers Retroactive Opinions
The groomzilla is a unique breed in that he is likely to present no hint of opinions throughout the decision making process or planning process , yet he develops very passionate feelings about wedding elements when they're past the point of alteration. Frustration ensues for all parties.
3. He Pouts Over His Lack of Groom Showers
You may hear a Groomzilla mumble something to the effect of, "You get to open so many gifts, eeemmmm Men need underwear and cooking-ware too." not funny though !
4. He Demands Groom-Centric Activities
Despite the fact that the entire wedding is focused on the bride and groom, the Groomzilla will demand even more, man-dedicated attention in the form of cigar bars, groom's cakes, and whiskey tasting like all the grooms attention should be passed on to him. He is, in fact, the belle of the ball, and demands to be treated as such.
5. He Expects Perfection
The Groomzilla usually boasts a unique, warped sense of self-importance to himself  that will now cause him to believe his wedding is more important than the millions of other weddings taking place in this world . Consequently, he demands perfection — from vendors, his groomsmen, his DJ, and beyond.