Tvc presenter Wale Fakile speaks out

Following the information spilled out from Linda Ikeji's blog on Thursday19th of May 2016, about a presenter on Television Continental, TVC, Wale Fakile, an easy going gentle man  who co-presents ‘Trends’ and the popular, ‘Question of the day’,allegedly involved in battery. Well I think he was wrongly accused hearing his part of the story. 

It is a given you don't judge from one end as there's always three sides of a story. ( The truth, yours and mine).

Now read Wale's exact words as he published on his Facebook wall.......‎

MY VERSION OF THE STORY

"I have read all the tirades and accusations levelled against me by Mandy Isaac on Social Media and for posterity and records purposes, I need to state my side of the story. Yes, it is true that we are friends but we stopped dating in June 2015.

However, we started talking again in December 2015.

Our last date was on Wednesday, May 16th, 2016 in my residence and in spite of Mandy telling me that she had stopped drinking, she requested for alcohol which I did not oblige her. However, I later found out that she had drank 2 cans of Vodka (picture below).

I went out to withdraw some money and she stepped out too,When I returned, she got back and accused me of talking to ladies and insisted she had to leave that night. I pleaded with her but she said she would leave and I gave her N2,000 as Transport fare.

In her semi-nude state, she flared up, demanded for N50,000 and called me unprintable names having taking possession of my phone.

Later, she went berserk and started destroying things in my house (See pictures below) before she started rolling herself on the floor.

I got a call the same night from a female police officer at Ketu Police Station (I was NEVER ARRESTED) who asked that I report at the station that night or the following morning. I could not go to the police station that night because it was already late (some minutes past 11:00pm) but I made sure that I got to the station as early as possible (8:00am).

To my surprise she never showed up even after my call at the station.

It is unfortunate that this happened to me but I am not only a responsible man but I also work in a responsible organisation that values and cherishes its publics.

This is a deliberate attempt to frame me and I call on investigative Journalists to go deeper than the story and either verify me or corroborate my claims".

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Mandy’s post on Facebook reads: “I am Mandy, my supposed boyfriend that works with TVC, beat me yesterday to stupor with bruises all over and he said there is nothing Ican do about it because he is rich and workswith TVC and am poor.The case was said to have been reported to the Ministry of Women Affairs and the Management of TVC.

Now I have read the girl's story, I don't feel pity for her( my opinion) .....Why shouldn't your name be published ? if you could publish wales name and details for the world to see, then your name should be published.

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I am an advocate for total respect of Women ... and I detest men who beat women.

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As much as we condemn these kind of issues, we should also not support immoral act. ‎

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We keep encouraging dumb arse girls who commit fornication in the name of Bf/Gf and snap rubbish pictures of bruises and post online... She covered her eyes but left her chest opened... 

I have absolutely no sympathy for this lady.‎

We should be very careful in rushing into Judging this kind of case.

In summary, men should try as much as possible to avoid such situation.

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I Have It All — So Why Am I Not Happy?‎ ‎

Rita Aju 

I used to spend long nights wide awake, wandering around our house, wondering what I was missing in my life. I blamed myself for feeling this way. How could I be ungrateful when I had it all—a beautiful family, a loving friend and an amazing career in journalism ?

I grew up with the conviction that my studies, my job, and my perfect future family would make me happy. I gave my all to becoming happy and successful. I made sure to be the best girlfriend, the best mom, and the best daughter I could be. I lived like a robot, trying hard to live up to my own and other's expectations. ‎

My story is not unique. We live in a world filled with demands and expectations—what’s right and wrong, good and bad, what will show success and not failure. There are many voices telling us what to wear, what to eat, how to exercise, whom to marry, and what we should achieve. Even our bodies are great targets for judgment. In our quest to fit in and do the right thing, we create stress, anxiety, exhaustion, and depression. Not feeling great, or even well, has become the norm or let's say daily practice for many.

Then I made an amazing discovery: I realized I had been living someone else’s life. Other people’s, Society's,  My family's,  Anyone's but not my own.

What was missing in my life wasn’t another promotion, a higher salary, or a more perfect man. What was missing was me.

I once read that, when you wake up, see the sunlight streaming through the window, not the wallpaper that needs fixing. When the familiar voice in your head says there’s something wrong with you or that you’re not good enough, just say to yourself, "Stop!" Then tell yourself, "I’m brilliant, just the way I am." Be your own cheerleader. I wish I can!‎

Today I no longer try to fit in or be perfect. I had lived so much life based on what other people expected that I didn’t even know what was true for me anymore.

I think al I need to do is create a life where I’m included—a life that's different, more joyful, and vibrant. 

Most people look for someone else to acknowledge them when they are not acknowledging themselves. In the past, what I really longed for was to be seen. To be validated. Today I know that only I—no one else—can give myself a sense of worth. 

Acknowledging that opens up the magical place I knew as a little girl, the magical place where everything is possible, because everything I need is within me, yes within me. But how can I get it out is my problem. #sadface. ‎

We’re all spiritually, emotionally, and physically aware beings. We pick up stuff from the world around us—and the result is that many of our thoughts, feelings, and emotions aren’t our own. Instead we pick them up in different conversations, situations, and motivations from those around us.

If you find yourself buying into a point of view that doesn’t feel right, ask yourself: Is this point of view mine? Did I buy into it somewhere along the line? Am I choosing what’s true for me or what everyone else is choosing?‎

Cut out those things that aren't working—and add the things and the people that make you happy. Sign up for that yoga class you never seem to have time for. Set aside a night to have dinner with friends who make you smile. Paint your office. Join groups. Go out dancing. Book that trip you've always wanted to go on. Take life so so, as m friend would say. Shake things up!

Most of us keep creating our lives more or less within our comfort zone. Repeating slightly different versions of past choices feels familiar and helps us predict the outcome. Even though this often means that we recreate undesirable and destructive situations, we imagine that stepping out of our comfort zone to try something new must be worse. What would you choose if you knew that was a lie?

What if there’s nothing wrong with me?

Instead of judging your body because you think it’s not thin enough to fit media-set expectations, try expressing your gratitude for its wisdom and its beauty, for all it’s done for you, for how it’s carried you through your life and still does.

Instead of judging yourself for being foolish, you might congratulate yourself for daring to choose something different, something you feel is right.

I feel like I am trapped in my own mind

Rita Aju

It is dark in here, I could only see through my mind,it feels so long that I am trapped in my own prison ...how can I walk out of the door with my legs. Can a man ever be happy again?  Struggle, anger, resentment, genus....in the midst of all these factions..Only me can help me.‎

Feeling trapped in your own mind is an unpleasant feeling and one many people with anxiety suffer with. I could give a list of why this is but in my opinion the main cause is the pondless thinking about ‘us’. If you think about the average person walking down the street, they will be thinking about the meal on Saturday, then the meeting at work later in the day, meeting friends for lunch, everything is outward, where as anxiety sufferes think mainly of themselves and how they are feeling, everything is inward, which causes many of the feelings of being trapped in your own mind.
I spent years thinking about me, worrying and trying to figure a way out of the way I felt, but this had the opposite effect and I began to feel more and more trapped and isolated. Of course I would feel trapped in my own mind, it makes sense to me now as I never let anything else in, the deep thinking about the way I felt and how to escape had sent me down a path where ‘anxiety’ had become me, I was so used to worrying and thinking that this became a habit, like a needle stuck in a record.

So what I needed to do was change this process and let other things into my day, live in the present and stop worrying about me, the past and the future, it was time to escape from my own mind, to unlock some doors and begin to live again. So I had to begin teach myself to live in the present. If I had to cook, then I would cook, I would not cook and worry about me anymore. If I went to the shop to buy some groceries then that is what I would do, I would not spend the whole walk thinking about how to escape from my anxiety. Of course the habit to think about me was there, I felt as though my mind was on me most of the day, but that was fine, that was a habit, this would thaw in time as long as I continued to practice this way.

Anyone who knows me will know I am not a big fan of forums, I really dislike them because again I think people become reliant on them, logging in everyday to talk and read about anxiety, day in day out and to be fair I see the same names there years later. I am anxiety free now but I am involved so much in the subject I do need to take a break from time to time, I need to have other things in my life and I make a conscious effort to play sport, to socialise, to go out riding my bike and other things. My week has many a focus and feels fresh and not bogged down with one subject.

So anxiety or not just try and add other things into your week, try not to worry so much, anxiety has a habit of making us think the worst and on finding an outlet things get magnified. Trust me once you take the anxiety away then you find it hard to worry, the need is just not there. This taught me a lot once I began to really make strides into my recovery. Before I would be in worry mode and think everything needed to be sorted out, worry about what people thought, worry about meeting someone, worry about how I was feeling, the whole cycle. But into my recovery I would have some really good weeks, almost anxiety free and the need to worry would not be there, I would smile at some of things that had me worrying the month before. The trick then was to realise that my anxiety magnified things and the next time anxiety reared its head I would just let everything go, it was not going to have me worrying, going over things trying to make things right, my anxiety was no longer going to send me down the road of worry, making me feel awful, the worrys were false anyway, caused by my anxiety needing an outlet. In time I actually became a master in letting things go, the more you practice the easier things get.

Feeling free of my own mind was a gradual process, it came in layers, the worry slowed, my mind became clearer and I felt alive again, free of myself. Below is a list of things that helped me overcome this feeling and what caused me to feel this way in the first place.
What caused it:

The deep thinking about my condition
Worrying about everything and anything
Not adding other things into my day, having no other focus but me

Things that helped me:

Getting out and socialising more, finding new hobbies, in my case it was redescovering my love for sport. In the early days I had to drag the old worrying me there, but I went for a swim, went cycling and just stopped sitting at home brooding about my situation. I trusted that in time my mind would regain its flexability, would welcome plenty of other things to focus on, become more flexible and in time it did. I would wake up and think about it being a nice day and about my bike ride, I would stop off for a drink and a sandwich, before I would wake up and think ‘Anxiety and how am I going to get rid of it’ to feel more real I had live more real was my motto.

Just living for that day. The first time I went running I was thinking how great I would feel, how my anxiety would improve and almost watching how I felt when I got back and being disapointed if I did not. Again I was doing things wrong, I was running to fix my anxiety and again doing two things at once, running and think

ing about me, instead of just being in the present and running. So the next time I went I thought I don’t care how I feel when I get back, if I feel great then brilliant, if not then o.k, that is not why I am running anymore and the run was far better. ‎

But sometimes I still feel like I am in my own prison.